Worrying vs. Planning + Overthinking vs. Self-Reflection

Worrying is described as a chain of negative thoughts about bad things that might happen in the future.

Worrying is a normal part of existence. Many of us worry about the future. Excessive worry, however, can lead to physical problems such as headaches, depression, weakened immune system, increased blood pressure, and more. For this reason, it is good to realize if your worrying has become an ineffective habit, and if so, what to do about it.

Facts:
-Around 1/3 of U.S. adults experience some kind of anxiety disorder
-Less than half get professional treatment
-Anxiety has two coping paths: worry and avoidance
-Research shows people think worrying is helpful for coping (nope!), uncontrollable (the brain is a runaway train), and worrying should be suppressed (which actually makes it worse)

Characteristics of excessive worrying:
-Usually doesn’t provide any solutions for vague fears
-Approaches problems from a position of fear and anxiety
-Makes it difficult to fall asleep
-Causes you to overanalyze situations (even trivial scenarios)
-Causes you to constantly ruminate (think over and remember) every uncomfortable thing that happens
-Is addictive (you seem to look for things to worry about because it gives the illusion of control)
-Focuses on the worst-case scenario

Characteristics of planning/problem solving:
-Takes into account facts and evidence when dealing with problems
-Takes into account worries that are solvable and worries that are not
-Brainstorms possible solutions for worries that are solvable
-Identifies a remedy or course of action for solvable worries
-Views a realistic spectrum of possible outcomes (from worst to best)
-Focuses on what can be done today
-Accepts uncertainty about the future

Tips to interrupt your worrying:
-Exercise (even a walk around the block or climbing steps can help)
-Yoga/meditation/mindfulness
-Journal/get creative
-Challenge your worrisome thoughts and talk them over with someone you trust
-Set aside a worry period in order to investigate your worrisome thoughts (20 minutes of focused worrying). When this time is over, engage in productive activities.
-Perform random acts of kindness. If you are dealing with excessive worry, it helps to focus on the lives of others for a change. Share your unique talents and gifts. Say something nice and unexpected.

Optional journal questions: 
1. I feel the least worried when I…
2. What are the top five things I’m worried about right now?
3. Are my worries realistic?
4. What if everything goes right?
5. Describe three people you can turn to when you are worried.
6. What went right today? What small thing can you look forward to tomorrow?

PART 2: Overthinking vs. Self-Reflection

Both overthinking and self-reflection involve spending a lot of time thinking about something. (The gifted brain loves abstract challenges related to thinking hard.) That being said, self-reflection leads to insights and overthinking leads nowhere. Overthinking results from obsessing about the past or future. 

Overthinking 101:
-Thoughts happen automatically in our minds.
-We unconsciously form habits related to thinking. Some of these habits do not serve us.
-Our first step to better mental hygiene is to notice our thoughts (see the attached emotional hygiene screenshots)
-Our second step is to notice our common triggers for overthinking. (Emotional triggers refer to words, actions, opinions, people, situations, etc. that activate rumination. These could be related to past trauma, something or someone challenging our beliefs/values, and our mind trying to preserve our ego/sense of self)
-Our third step is to find an effective way to stop over-thinking (even when triggered) and stay focused on the moment or the task at hand.  

How to move from overthinking to self-reflection:
-Set aside time for planning. Remind yourself you have a plan so you can ease your anxiety about the future. Establish priorities and aspirations.
-Eliminate distractions while planning. No social media, no videos in the background, no news, etc. that could trigger outside thoughts.
-Minimize input from low quality sources and seek out deep inspiration.
-Set aside times for breaks. Breaks rejuvenate your mind and can help ease frustration. Have periodic breaks to avoid burnout. 
-Design symbols and reminders about your mission/goals in life. Be creative! This could be in the form of pictures of mentors, a vision board, a quote wall in your bedroom, or an artistic creation you are proud of. When you see the symbol, remember your goals. 
Journal. Write down your goals and review them often. Dr. Gail Matthew found that written goals were 39.5% more likely to succeed! Those who wrote their goals and sent them to friends were 76.7% more likely to succeed. 

Optional journal questions:

1. Where are the quality breaks in your schedule? Do you have time in your schedule for planning?
2. What are the biggest distractions in your life right now? How can you get them under control?
3. What topics trigger your overthinking? Do you notice any patterns? Are they topics about the future, uncomfortable social situations from the past, fears?
4. Free write: What is the difference between over-thinking and self-reflection?